34 JULY 2017 ARCAD A NEWS By Laura Stoddard Summer time in Phoenix can be brutal. Once those triple-digits hit, we’re ready to get as far away as possible. However, time, money and other factors don’t always allow us to take big, elaborate dream vacations. If you find yourself in that situation, why not actually remain in the Valley for a staycation ? At this time of year, hotel rates (including Four- and Five-Diamond resorts) plummet, allowing you and yours to experience the beaut y and amenities of these exclusive properties. In addition to their superior golf courses, high-end restaurants and luxurious rooms, these resorts boast amazing pools and water parks. Here are a few worth diving into. THE WESTIN KIERLAND RESORT & SPA kierlandresort.com 6902 E. Greenway Parkway, Scottsdale, 85254 If you’re looking to do more than just laze in the water, enjoy the Westin’s weekly summer activities, like poolside Glow Parties, live music, the Polar Plunge, or the 3-D Paintscaping light show. Check out the Adventure Pool, Lazy River, or 110-foot waterslide, and enjoy cool treats delivered right to you by resort’s own ice cream truck. Now through September 4, take advantage of “The Big Chill” Package, and choose from either a $50 per room/ per night dining credit, or two free sessions on the FlowRider wave simulator. Rates start at $149/night. ARIZONA GRAND RESORT & SPA arizonagrandresort.com 8000 Arizona Grand Parkway, Phoenix, 85044 Voted by the Travel Channel as one of the country’s “Top 10 Water Parks”, this sprawling acreage is comprised of multiple pools, including the Oasis Wave Pool, Lazy River, 25-person hot tub, heated kids pool and spray deck, and two, harrowing eight- story thrill slides. Relax in the grass, on the patio, or in one of the shaded cabanas and fuel up at the indoor/outdoor Oasis Bar & Grill. Rates start at $119/night, and booking 14 or more days in advance will save you 15 percent. HYATT REGENCY RESORT & SPA AT GAINEY RANCH scottsdale.regency.hyatt.com 7500 E. Doubletree Ranch Road, Scottsdale, 85258 Set amidst beautiful surroundings, this 2.5-acre water park has 10 swimming pools, dozens of fountains and waterfalls, a sandy beach, private hot tubs, and a 3-story waterslide. Enjoy poolside service, from towels to cocktails, provided by the H2Oasis staff. Adult and family cabanas are available, and if you love the water, but don’t want to get wet, enjoy one of the resort’s romantic Gondola rides around and through the property. During the summer months, rooms start at $150/night. POINTE HILTON TAPATIO CLIFFS RESORT tapatiocliffshilton.com 11111 N. 7th Street, Phoenix, 85020 This resort’s Falls Water Village is a sprawling compley, with acres of sparkling pools, waterfalls and beautiful terraces. Choose from one of eight pools, take a dip in the Hot Plunge Whirlpool, zoom down the enclosed 138-foot waterslide, or curl up and relax in a private cabana. Send the little ones to the Kids Korral for water-based, seasonal activities, while you pick up a refreshing drink at Cascades Café. Rooms start at $116/night.        By Laura Stoddard We are fortunate to live in one of the most beautiful states in the nation. The beauty, diversity, grandeur and variance in landscape, vegetation and climate from one region to the next, make Arizona wholly unique. Surrounded by sun and succulents one moment, immersed in pine trees and snow two hours later. That’s Arizona. Sixty years ago, Arizona State Parks & Trails was founded, with the mission of “managing and conserving Arizona’s natural, cultural and recreational resources for the benefit of the people both in our parks and through our partners.” Well, mission accomplished. There are more than two dozen state parks in Arizona; immaculately and skillfully cultivated and maintained. You’ve undoubtedly heard of the more popular ones, such as Kartchner Caverns, Slide Rock and Tonto National Bridge. But there are so many more offering their own unique views and exploration opportunities. Ever been hiking in Homolovi, Cattail Cove or Yuma Quartermaster Depot? There are literally hundreds of miles of astoundingly beautiful countryside (and caves) to explore. Arizona State Parks has the details on every park, trail, hike and campground out there. Visitors to Arizona State Park’s website will find trail maps, reservations for campgrounds, cabins and tours, information on grant and preservation programs, and, of course, day and annual pass information. There is an astounding number of activities taking place in our state parks. Check out the calendar of events to find out the latest on concerts, tube floats, cave tours, races, exhibitions, festivals, volunteer events and basics, including boating, fishing and swimming. You can also sign up for their newsletter or download a statewide guide to keep up with everything the agency is doing. Arizona State Parks protects and preserves 35 state parks and natural areas. The agency also includes the State Trails Program, outdoor-related Grants Program, statewide outdoor recreation planning, the State Historic Preservation Office, as well as the Off-Highway Vehicle Program and more. Arizona State Parks manages eight of the top 25 most visited natural attractions in Arizona, according to its website So how many have you been to? Summer’s upon us. Time to get out and explore! Just be sure to find out the hours and entry fees for whichever park you’re visiting, as they vary. If you aren’t the outdoorsy type, or know someone who loves the outdoors and is otherwise hard to shop for, consider purchasing them a gift card to Arizona’s parks. Order by phone or online, and choose from denominations of $25, $50, or $100. Gift cards can be used for park entrance, overnight camping, store purchases and tours. If you want to go all-out (for yourself or as a gift), consider an annual pass. The Standard Pass is $75 and allows entrance for the pass holder and three additional adults in the same vehicle into all state parks, but restrictions are imposed on some parks depending on the season and/or day of the week. For example, the standard pass won’t allow you into Slide Rock Park on any weekends between April 1 and October 31. The Premium Pass is $200 and allows the pass holder and three additional adults in the vehicle entrance to all state parks at all times (within operating hours). So hop in the car, grab your fishing gear or hiking boots, and head out to one of these amazing, diverse locations. With 27 to choose from, you’ll never get bored, and your appreciation for the beauty of our state can only increase. For more, visit azstateparks.com or call 877-MYPARKS (877-697-2757).          Slide Rock State Park and Red Rock State Park near Sedona showcase the state’s beautiful red rock formations. Trails throughout Red Rock wind through manzanita and juniper to reach the rich banks of Oak Creek.

35 JULY 2017 ARCAD A NEWS Arcadia News 25 th Anniversary Feature By Greg A. Bruns For a while there, I was only known as “13.” Oh, sure, they all knew my actual name, but it was way more fun to mess with the newbie and call me by number. Plus, it freed them from any internal restrictions they may have had about abusing people, since I was, after all, only a number. This was my first real job out of college and I was determined to put the brain cargo I had amassed to work. It was time for me to start a long and glorious career as a Park Ranger. My first assignment: Patagonia Lake State Park in southern Arizona, just 15 minutes from the Mexico border. I was certain that I would be the fine example that all other rangers would be judged against. I was going to blaze a trail and show the visitors of the park the splendid beauty and intriguing history of their protected treasure, all while gently reminding them of the rules and responsibilities that come with such a perfect paradise. I would be the modern- day version of Teddy Roosevelt; a conservationist and a pioneer in the field. Someday they would build a monument of me at the park entrance. People might name a college after me, or at the very least, a library wing. I lasted four months. It was August when I realized I was hired only because I looked hardy enough to dig ditches in the blazing heat of the southern Arizona summer. I recall being asked in my interview – in March – about working in the heat. As a cool, lake breeze wafted through the head ranger’s office, I proudly told him about my experience laboring in the fierce Arizona summer. I regaled him with the story about working outside as a landscaper (fancy word for grass cutter) in the summer of 1990 – when the temperature climbed to a brain-swelling 122 degrees. Our employer’s truck had died – so we had to walk two miles to get back to the office. This seemed to impress him and in a couple days, I received the phone call confirming that I was hired. When I showed up at the park on my first day, I was given my badge and walkie- talkie. Whoa – no one said anything about a badge. The shiny shield on my puffed chest meant I had – nay, commanded – authority! Respect! Dignity! Honor! Code of the gladiator! “What kind of weapon will I carry?” I asked, pinning the badge on my uniform, my eyes tearing up a bit at the responsibility – the sober faith – that was being instilled in me. “If you mean your shovel ,” I was informed, “well, you can pick that up at the work shed.” I then spent over an hour learning proper walkie-talkie etiquette. Seems there are an awful lot of retired people who visit the park, and they all have scanners. We were to assume that our mothers were listening at all times. There would be no broadcasting first or last names or any other identifying characteristic – only the ranger number. And that’s how I became 13. The first couple months weren’t too horrible, although I was cleaning toilets more than anything else. I noticed that I wasn’t the only ranger participating in this humbling activity – everyone did potty duty. Even the guy who had been there 12 years was scraping kidney juice off the urinals. I figured he must be an ex-convict or just amazingly stupid. As it turned out, he had a degree in Environmental Science from Clark University – one of the best “earth schools” in the country. Hey – wait a minute – I’ve got a degree in earth sciences too… as I was mulling around the word prognostication, the water main on the east side of the park broke and spouted a geyser in the middle of the road that was just skimming the troposphere. The whole park went berserk. My radio was squawking. Park dwellers were howling about the sudden lack of water pressure. And just like that, “13” was suddenly the only one around. It was August, it was hot and humid, and apparently I was the only ranger who was stupid enough not to find a reason to get in a truck and bail to Nogales for “supplies.” All five of the other rangers on duty were smoking tires toward the border in a King Cab Chevy before I even got to my weapon of choice, which would turn out to be a blue trenching shovel. Three record-temperature days, ten bloody blisters, and six feet of caliche soil later, I found the main water pipe. I had dug a huge trench on one side of the road where the water had surfaced. I was still the only one up there digging, and the other rangers were marveling at the red- faced 13, who was unable to lift a canteen of water to his lips without crouching, due to the muscle failure in my arms. Once I found the main line, I enthusiastically radioed down to the base to let them know. “That’s good,” said ‘One’ (the lead ranger), “now we need to dig out the other side of the road to isolate the pipe.” I wiped the salt crystals from my face (heat exhaustion had set in) and laughed. We? What WE are WE talking about? My limit had been reached and whether they were testing me or abusing me, I wasn’t going to take it anymore. Like a Harlem fire hydrant wrenched open on a hot summer day, a series of obscenities and expletives burst forth. I started the transmission by using the word “mother” in conjunction with another word and rattled off a tirade that lasted a good 30 seconds. Then I held down the transmit button, jamming the entire channel. I held that puppy down until “One” came barreling around the corner in his truck, at a rather astounding rate of speed. As he skidded up to my location, I could see the radio in his hand and the fury in his scowl. He started to say something, but I had no intention of listening to anything but the sound of my car throttling into passing gear as I screamed up the highway back to Phoenix. Then I delivered what would be my final transmission: “Thirteen, out.” — Greg can be reached via e-mail: greg@arcadianews.com. My Name is ‘13’ As part o f our anniversar y ce l ebration throughout 2017, we wi ll re-print some o f our f avorite photos and stories f rom the past 25 y ears. These specia l s are identi f ied with our “25th Anniversar y Feature” banner at the top o f the page. This “SUWAT” was origina lly pub l ished in August, 2007. It was August when I realized I was hired only because I looked hardy enough to dig ditches in the blazing heat of the southern Arizona summer.” KACHINA Quality Dry Cleaning 602-955-5540 3926 E. 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